November 17th, 2008

Bleak evening

Do you know the feeling of being a garbage can? I do. And I don't know how I had survived for once, and twice and thrice. For countless times to be exact.

But you can never defeat me. I will be willing to stand. More than willing. That, I am certain.


Blah blah blah.

I'm more than tired. But the amount of my willingness to fight outweighs my burdens. 


Kapoy na ko gamay. Puyat na ako. I am bombarded. But to continue sailing in this ocean of life with so many obstacles is worth it.

So I shall survive.

 

Posted by merlynthemagical at 01:08 PM | 3 comments

November 15th, 2008

Guilt

Too much happiness isn’t good at all. Why? Because it makes me more selfish. It makes me more confident of things that are fleeting. It makes me forget people, “important people matter-of-factly.” Has it crossed your mind, that sometimes you don’t want to be so happy anymore, so to stop yourself from forgetting people in your life? Sometimes, I’d rather be lonely and sad than to be happy and so alive and full of company. I’d rather be lonely and sad, and be able to keep in touch with people I love, than be happy in the company of others and still the next day when the fun is over, I would sit in front of the computer and write about my emptiness. Who doesn’t want to be happy? Sometimes, I get tempted and I would love to raise my hand, if being asked with such question. Happiness is a reminder that we are (at the end of the day) simply alone.

I was taken aback by the thoughts I have made. Scary. They are so scary.

Posted by merlynthemagical at 11:37 PM | 11 comments

After an awesome possum dinner at Professor Weinhausen's house, I didn't think the night could get any better.

 

And it didn't.

 

 

Because Jenny parks her car really close to the neighboring spot, and I get stuck with the spot with the dumb pole, I scratched the side of my car.

What a way to end my night.
I'm sad.
How am I supposed to study for two midterms when all I can feel is sad because of my car?

 

And seriously, why the heck can't Jenny take the inner spot because she has hecka more experience driving and parking than I do. Plus, I leave a lot more than she does. D:

Posted by LastStarryNight at 01:25 AM | 2 comments

November 11th, 2008

I'm done playing nice.

Whoever says that sasquatches do not exist have not lived in my apartment, because I tell ya, they're living in the apartment right above mine. I deal with them stomping around. I deal with the fact that they shh'd me for talking too loudly--even though my window was open. I deal with hearing their conversations clearly through the ceiling. I deal with the fact that their bed is hella squeaky. I deal with everything, simply because I try to be nice and reasonable. 

 

But when they all of a sudden decide to stomp around, fall everywhere, bang on the walls/floor/whatever, shout their conversations, and play their bass/music super duper loudly at 2 am in the morning so the walls are vibrating to their horrible music when my roommate and I are clearly sleeping, then that just is annoying and makes me mad.

 

I'm done playing nice.

 

The girls in apartment 428 now have a complaint report filed under them at the office -- and if they piss me off again, I'll report them again until they get kicked out.

They better watch it, because Jennifer is angry.

  

Posted by LastStarryNight at 09:42 PM | 4 comments

MARIJUANA? MY QUESTION IS, WHY?

Tell me what are you?

Because I don’t know.

Why me?

For the life of me

I have been carrying loads of stuff

But still you seemed so happy seeing me suffer

Yes, I deserve this because

You wanted me to stay strong

And to always call Your name

And yes, it’s my pleasure.

I don’t have any slightest idea

Marijuana will become his company

I never thought

Yes, my very own brother

Has become one of those who finds pleasure

In smoking

And my brother.

Why?

I do not know

Tell me who knows how to read everyone’s mind

Tell me how fortunetelling works?

And I shall try every impossible

Way to stop him from drowning himself into the pit of darkness

Maybe, I do not understand

But why?

MY QUESTION IS WHY?

Look at how fast the wheel spins. Yesterday’s a bliss, now’s a blast. Life can be a smooth-sailing road but it can also be a nauseating ride. Who says life is fair? When all the good things happened to the bad people and all the bad things happened to the good people? How ironic? Such a wonderful twist. Despite all my complaints, I still believe in Him. Because no one, nothing is bigger and powerful than Him.

 

They said, “THE WORLD IS ROUND, MAGIC DEAR, SO WORRY NOT, YOU CAN HAVE YOUR WAY UP THERE.”

 

Merlyn

Posted by merlynthemagical at 08:39 PM | 5 comments

Love is

when you feel you're the happiest person in the world.

All I want to think is NOW, NOW AND NOW and NOW. From the deepest part of me, I feel happy. 

 

Yes. NO. Oh yes. I am in love

 

Posted by merlynthemagical at 09:15 AM | 5 comments

Still nostalgic

 

 

Can't do anything, can't write, thoughts are dishevelled. I miss home. But I have no choice but to be used to this. To be immuned and be numb.

Home.

Posted by merlynthemagical at 02:12 AM | 3 comments

November 10th, 2008

I'm back

home

my cousins and my big bro

 

me and my brother

My father

Me and my bro

Merry Christmas! MY sis and my bro.

I don't want to go

 

 

10 days wasn't enough.....but at least....finally I've come to realize that reality is better than my dreams. I am glad I have a family, though not perfect but totally happy.

 

Currently feeling: nostalgic
Posted by merlynthemagical at 02:27 AM | 7 comments
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